Wedding Music Part 3

Feb 9

In the previous installments of this series, we looked at the impact of music on your wedding day and the technical details of booking live musicians. This month, we’re wrapping up our trilogy and going over the etiquette of working with a band or solo musician.

For this article, we got the insight of four experienced musicians: Simon of Hype Creek, a Nashville-based wedding and event band; Shawn of Greenwood Rye, a jam-grass band that plays weddings in addition to touring; Liana Alpino, a Nashville-based harpist who plays weddings and events throughout Middle Tennessee and beyond; and Zelda Sheldon, an officiant, singer, and ukulele player who often incorporates music into the ceremonies she officiates.

What does a wedding day look like with a band?

From the couple’s perspective, a wedding day with a good wedding band should be pretty seamless. The band will work with your wedding coordinator and/or venue to make sure they have all the information they need to MC, guiding you and your guests through the day's events. Of course, for the band, the day is a lot more complicated.

Simon, Hype Creek (HC): “We like to arrive at least 4 hours before the ceremony starts to get the stage, lighting, and sound checking out of the way before the guests arrive. Oftentimes, we also are performing acoustic during the ceremony and/or cocktail hour, so this sometimes adds an additional factor to our setup. This makes more of a streamlined transition between different parts of the wedding, as well as allowing our female front, Ginny, to MC and make sure everything is running smoothly and on time. For breakdown, we usually have a team come in to assist us so we can be on the road within an hour after the reception ends. All in all, we typically are working around 10 hours on the wedding day, and depending on the guests' requests, we may also need to learn new songs and have a rehearsal for the first dance songs.”
Shawn, Greenwood Rye (GR): “It takes a couple hours to get set up and sound checked. If the ceremony/cocktail hour/reception are all in the same space, that can mean set up time will have to be 2 hours before the first guests arrive, in order to be silent at that time. Breakdown is another hour or so after we finish.”

As a solo instrumentalist who focuses on ceremony music, Liana’s schedule looks a little different. In the lead-up to the wedding, she does a lot of prep work, including a Zoom consultation where clients can hear their chosen songs played live and go over ceremony details. The week before the wedding, she confirms the details with the coordinator. Then comes the big day.

Liana, Harpist (H): “On the wedding day, I arrive approximately 45 minutes before the performance time to unpack, tune, and set up. I typically provide 30 minutes of pre-ceremony music, perform all the ceremony pieces, and then play a 10-minute postlude as guests transition to cocktail hour (unless I’m also booked for the cocktail hour, in which case I continue playing). Breakdown is usually quick and happens after the ceremony site has cleared.”
Zelda, Ukulele (U): “On the wedding day, I typically arrive 30 minutes before the ceremony start time if I’m hired to perform music as well as officiate. If there is a DJ and it’s a large group where I need to be mic’ed, I’ll chat with the DJ about when in the ceremony to bring in the music at the end.
“One thing to consider is how the officiant will be amplified if it’s a large group. Long before the wedding day, I’ll discuss the requirements with the couple when we first chat about the ceremony and the space. For micing the officiant or a solo musician, it’s imperative to have microphones on stands or lapel mics rather than hand-held microphones. Because the officiant will be reading from a book for the ceremony, and if playing a musical instrument, using both hands, at least one mic on a stand is needed.
“Ideally, for a singer and instrument, it will require two microphones and two microphone stands - one for the voice, and one for the instrument. On more than one occasion, I’ve had to do my best to be the elegant officiant while grappling with a handheld microphone that the DJ supplied without a mic stand. Awkward, especially when I need to turn the pages in my book. If there’s no mic stand supplied for performing a song, then I’ll need someone to actually hold the microphone for me as I sing and play ukulele, which I have done. Again, awkwardly. So these are the little important details that need to be discussed in the planning stage, so no unfortunate surprises.”

Etiquette

The etiquette around working with a band isn’t dissimilar from any other vendor. Basically, you want to be an organized and gracious host. This means communicating well in the lead-up to your wedding, making sure contracts and payments are signed and delivered on time, and ensuring the band is comfortable and has everything they need on the day of.

Shawn, GR: “Good logistical details ahead of time, including parking and load-in instructions. Attention to our needs, such as meals and green room space, is a big one. It's not fun to chase down a planner and track down the band meals. Running on time, without a bunch of days of changes. One point person and not multiple unknown people delivering changes/instructions.
“And then also, it makes for a really great event when we feel like we are part of the party. Being welcomed and offered a drink at the bar, etc.,” he adds. “Because when we are performing, we want to all be connected in a way through music, so it helps to feel that from the get-go.”

It’s important to keep the physical needs of both the musicians and their instruments in mind. This includes making sure the band has food and a place to eat it, but it also means having a contingency plan for inclement weather. Heat and humidity can be even harder on instruments than on the people playing them, causing harps and guitars to go out of tune or even crack.

Liana, H: “I want couples to understand that our instruments are not only valuable but also our livelihood. We invest a great deal of time and passion into our craft. Playing in heat or humidity is challenging on both the musicians and their instruments. There’s a saying that if you’re uncomfortable outside, so is your instrument. Musicians cannot perform in extreme temperatures or rain, so it’s important to have a backup plan for weather and to communicate openly with your musicians about what conditions will work best.”

Finally, as with many other vendors, it’s traditional to tip musicians. The suggested amount is between $25 and $50 per musician. It’s also recommended that you tip any sound professionals or other crew helping the band.

Communication is key

You may have noticed the word “communication” coming up again and again in this article. Overwhelmingly, the musicians we spoke with brought up good communication as key to them - and the couples they worked with - having a good experience. When asked what he wanted clients to know before booking a band and what makes a wedding a great experience for musicians, communication was Simon of Hype Creek’s answer for both.

Simon, HC: “I think communication between the client and the band is most important for making a wedding a good experience. Knowing specific details of the wedding or about the couple, venue details and tech info, age demographic, timeline, some of the bridesmaids' and groomsmen's favorite songs and genres, and guest count. Age demographic, along with guest count, can really help us curate a custom setlist for the wedding or private event.
“There are a couple different layers to this. One can be making sure we know what songs they want us to play, and which songs they want on a do-not-play list. Another is if the couple wants the band to play the first dances, or if they just want the recordings played through the main speakers. Finally, it's very important to make clear if the couple wants a microphone and speaker set-up during the ceremony for the wedding officiant, speeches, and vows. A lot of times in the past, the couples have assumed that the speakers can be moved from the reception stage to the ceremony area, and while this can work sometimes, it's very unlikely in most scenarios.”

Liana expressed a similar sentiment.

Liana, H: “A good experience for me means having a clear point person to communicate with about setup location, any changes to the ceremony process, and someone who can reliably cue me for the start of the music. That level of organization makes everything run smoothly and helps me focus on delivering the best performance.”

She also offered advice on ensuring flawless communication:

“In my experience, having a great coordinator is key. I always recommend hiring a professional, even if just for the day of the event, if the budget allows. While I’ve worked with family members serving as coordinators, it can sometimes be overwhelming for them without event experience.”

Putting It All Together

Working with live musicians can help make your wedding magical, not just because of the music, but because of the people playing it. All of the musicians we spoke with expressed how much they loved helping couples and their loved ones create meaningful moments. They can help make your big day incredible - and uniquely you.

Liana, H: “I believe every couple should choose what feels right for them, even if it’s not standard!”

We couldn’t agree more! Whether you choose to work with a bluegrass band, a solo harpist, or a Spotify playlist; whether you walk down the aisle to a traditional wedding march, heavy metal, or a piano arrangement of your favorite video game soundtrack; we hope your wedding day and all the days after it are amazing. If you want to get in touch with any of the musicians we spoke to, you can reach them at the links below.